Thursday, January 21, 2016

10 Signs You're Probably Married to a Football Coach



  1. You see your child's school binder laying on the kitchen table. As you begin to yell out "Didn't I ask you to clean up after yourself?", you realize it isn't theirs after all- it's your husband's play book. The one written in a language only him and his players understand!
  2. Your husband's cell phone is constantly alerting him of a new text. Don't worry. He's not cheating on you, Mama. He's texting back and forth with his assistant coaches about this Saturday's game. It'll slow down at the end of the season, I promise!
  3. What?? Your husband is doing the dishes without even being asked? Nah, he's just making space in the sink to sterilize his team's water bottles.
  4. You can't fit a single grocery bag in the trunk of your SUV. Duh! It's filled with footballs, shoulder pads, tackling dummies, and water bottles.
  5. You bought your SUV exclusively for the third row. How else can your husband transport half of the team to and from practices?
  6. Your brand new SUV will smell like a portable locker room. Quick. It's okay. Nothing a little Febreze and cracked windows can't fix. I recommend waiting until after the season ends, of course!
  7. The kids are in bed and your husband turns on the television. Don't get too excited Mama, he's not putting on your favorite show. He's about to study film from yesterday's game. Ha!
  8. You are constantly sweeping up what appears to be rodent droppings. No need to call pest control! They're just "turf turds"- you know, those little black pieces of synthetic turf.
  9. Your fireplace mantle serves as not only a place for your beautifully and strategically placed pieces of décor, but for your husband's championship game runners-up trophy as well. I have to admit. I kind of like it there.
  10. You suddenly become Mama to an entire team of boys and you absolutely LOVE IT!!!




Got one to add to the list? Feel free to leave it in the comment section below!

1 comment:

  1. That will be me in the spring as a baseball mom!

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